Conversations with Court

I Will Never

2010-09-12T20:50:00.001-05:00

I always say, “I will NEVER send my child to church in high waters…”

But I did.

Would someone please remind me to buy him some new church pants this week. Please.

Thank you.

Today’s Treasures

2010-08-23T00:07:00.001-05:00

While discussing the impending arrival of another school day tomorrow, Colin said (with his most southern twang), “Why is it summer goes like this: snap, snap, snah-up? And school goes like this: snap…(pause)… snap…(pause)…snap?”

I didn’t have an answer. But I loved the way he said, snah-up.

Today Connor proclaimed, “Mom, I know my first “times” math problem. 5x2=10. And I think 49x2=98.” I hate to admit but, I was only half listening and I said, “That’s right.”

“It is?” he said. Then I paused…calculated…and realized, “Yeah, that IS right, Connor!” I was impressed and a tiny bit excited. I love math. Maybe he does too!

I was officially labeled, “Very out of shape” today while playing a friendly game of tether ball with Rhiannon. I was winded two minutes in and needed a water break. Even with my water breaks, she still beat me. Who knew tether ball was so physically challenging?

Kess made me laugh today when she proclaimed, “I’m SO bored! No one will play with me! I’m sure glad I’m NOT an only child, because I would be bored ALL of the time!”

I will definitely be reminding her of this in the near future.

Boys

2010-08-22T01:37:00.001-05:00

After a very easy going, semi-unproductive day, I took the boys to the pool. I have enjoyed our trips to the pool this summer. It’s especially fun when I can take just a couple of the kids and spend more individual time with them. Today’s trip included holding the tiny star ring, made for a toddler, while the boys tried to catapult into them. Being the somewhat paranoid-type I insisted on holding the ring about 4 ft away from the wall. It was hilarious watching how they would land on the tube. Typically, poor Connor would land one foot in and one foot out, split-style. He was not amused.

Colin had fairly good aim and often went right through the middle, but tried not to panic when he felt the snugness of the tube. There was fear in his eyes as he struggled to free himself.

When that game got old I told Connor I’d pay him a dollar if he could climb on to the top of the tube without any help from me or the side of the pool. The goal was to sit in the hole of the ring. After several unsuccessful tries, I decided to make things a little more exciting.

“Connor, I’ll pay you a dollar if you can do it. But you have to pay me a dollar if I can do it first.” Evidently I was delusional. Forgetting I’m in my mid thirties and completely out of shape I began launching myself onto a teeny tiny star shaped ring….in a swimsuit…er…dress two sizes too small. I’m sure someone’s watching me on youtube at this very moment. I obviously did not account for the fact that my butt is as wide as the entire circumference of the ring. I owe Connor a dollar.

After dinner Rhiannon and Kess went off to a birthday party and Todd and I took the boys for a walk. They have been saving their money so they could buy Connor a skateboard. I love the fact that Colin was willing to donate his money to Connor so that they could skateboard together. With skateboards in tow we headed down the walking trail.

Colin led the way.

Connor was close behind.

They tried out a new kind of skateboarding.

As always, it wouldn’t be a trip to the walking trail without a little exploring.

The adventure wouldn’t be complete without wet shoes, too!

Sweaty and tired we headed home, but not without being reminded of how much you boys really love each other. It makes a momma very happy!

The Truth Hurts

2010-08-21T22:08:00.001-05:00

The truth hurts. I’d imagine as a 7 year old sometimes it’s hard to tell the truth and sometimes it’s hard NOT to tell the brutal, honest truth. I’m guessing last night Connor wished to be back in this giant turtle shell following our conversation. It went a little something like this:

Me: Connor, did you know a Mrs. James at your school last year.

Connor: Yeah.

Rhiannon: What did she look like?

Connor: She was taller than mom.

Pause

Connor: She was skinnier than mom.

Pause….followed by Rhiannon reprimanding him

Connor: But she was (Then, desperately trying to save himself) But you’re still skinny, Mom.

Ouch. But I’m guessing, it was probably the truth. :)

A New Year

2010-08-21T21:43:00.001-05:00

It seems strange to me that January is officially “The New Year”, because mid-August actually feels more like A New Year. Thursday marked the day that summer ended and a new school year began. For most of the summer you guys would not even let me talk about school. You didn’t want to know when it was going to start. You didn’t want to know how many days of freedom you had left. We even waited until just a few days ago to buy your school supplies.

Once the supplies were in hand and we were headed to Open House, I think everyone finally accepted that school was coming whether we liked it or not. And I think, finally, there was a tinge of excitement in the air.

Thursday morning Dad took Colin and Connor to school…at 7:00, mind you…THAT’S SOOOO early!

Connor started the second grade this year. His teacher is Mrs. Welch. He’s so excited and absolutely LOVES her! This is the first year that you get to have class upstairs. You are so big and I’m so proud of you!

Colin is in the fourth grade. His teacher is Mr. Brew. Colin is so excited to have such a “cool” and “fun” teacher. He also gets to be the oldest in the school AND switch classes for different subjects. You’re growing so fast Colin.

After sending the boys off to school, the girls and I took our time, as we so often do, and finished the preparations for their first day.

Kess is starting the eighth grade at Lincoln Jr. High. I’m not sure she’s actually excited about going back, but I know how much she loves her friends at school. She gets to take really cool classes this year too, like Career Orientation (where she hopes to job shadow a zookeeper), and she’s also taking Pre-AP classes for the first time.

Rhiannon is also starting the eighth grade and not quite excited about school either. However, she too has great classes this year. This semester she’s taking Intro to Communication Arts. I think she’s going to like it a lot. She is also taking her first Pre-AP classes.

It’s seems like yesterday that we made the decision to start public school. The first day of Fifth grade must’ve been so scary. But you were so brave and you have done SO well. You’ve worked so hard and developed and grown into beautiful young women. I’m so proud of you guys!

I thought about you guys all day, and couldn’t wait to pick you up in the afternoon. Everyone had such a great day. Connor was so excited about the treasure box and the scoops of popcorn his class could earn. Colin was excited that he didn’t have any homework and got to do activities all day long. Rhiannon was excited that she has lunch with most of her friends, but sad that Kess has a different lunch period. Kess was brimming with excitement that her favorite teacher, Mrs. Lovegood, is her Seminar teacher.

After dinner we dined on a special treat that I made for you while you were at school.

Hehehe! Though I won’t be on Ace of Cakes anytime soon, this cake was full of love and laughter. I had a great time making it and knew you guys would think it was pretty funny. And as an added bonus, it actually tasted pretty good too!

So with a new year beginning I’m so excited to see what each of you will accomplish this year. I’m excited to be there by your side each step of the way. I’m looking forward to setting and accomplishing goals of my own too. I love each of you and I love being your mom.

Family Vacation 2009 – San Antonio

2010-05-23T23:26:00.001-05:00

After meeting my grandparents for breakfast the next morning, we headed to San Antonio. We wanted to see the Alamo and the Riverwalk. When I was ten we lived in San Antonio for a whopping 5 months. I remember going to the Alamo and the Riverwalk, but it was a lot more fun as an adult.

The grounds were beautiful! I never realized how desert-like San Antonio and Austin are. The trees are short and low to the ground. And of course it couldn’t be a desert without a few cacti! It was a beautiful sunny day! We cooled off in the shade with a shaved ice.Once we were sufficiently cool we took a stroll along the Riverwalk. It was so fun! I did have a few minor panic attacks, however, when we would walk along a narrow pathway…Connor got so tired of me clinging to him. But anyone who knows Connor knows he doesn’t walk, he bounces, uncontrollably. I was afraid he was going to bounce right into the river.We took a boat ride down the river. I took tons of pictures of the buildings, but now, I have no idea what was significant about them. The ride was fun, but eventually it got a little “long”. We were hot and tired… So you can imagine how happy we were to find Ice Cream! It was the best chocolate peanut butter ice cream I’ve ever had! Before hiking back to our car we stopped inside a hotel so that the girls could take a potty break. The boys entertained themselves by pretending they were on skateboards. We fell into bed exhausted and sooo excited for the next day!

Family Vacation 2009

2010-05-23T17:29:00.001-05:00

My grandparents live in Austin. The last time we saw them, Colin was a baby. So, as part of our summer plans we made a trip to Austin to see them.

Notice the white cloth on my grandpa’s arm? He’s a funny little man. Connor asked, “Why come you broke your arm?” Grandpa then explained that he keeps the cloth on his arm so his new puppy won’t scratch him. I loved visiting with them again. I have so many memories of visiting them in rural Arkansas when I was growing up. My fondest memories are of Grandma’s homemade breakfast with farm fresh eggs, that I “picked” myself, and homemade jam and biscuits. I watched my first duck hatch at their house and traveled home with 23 baby ducklings in a cardboard box. (That was a noisy ride home) I walked on a frozen pond at their house, and went fishing, shot BB guns, walked in the woods, picked plums, and ALWAYS took a swing on the tire swing! What amazing memories I have of them.

My kids enjoyed visiting with them too, but of course they were inclined to spend most of their time snuggling Grandma’s new dog, Kayla.

I never realized how much I look like my Grandma until I saw this picture. She is an amazing woman. She is so full of grace, strength, and courage! I love her and I’m so thankful for my family.

June 2009

2010-05-23T17:05:00.001-05:00

June began with Connor ending his baseball season. He really enjoyed baseball, even if it did include lots of

Waiting…

And waiting…

And then finding a way to occupy his time…during all that waiting.

In June Colin received special recognition at school. His second grade class voted, and he was awarded the Citizenship Award. We were so proud of him!

The girls celebrated the beginning of summer by having a water fight.

It all started when Rhiannon put a piece of ice down Kess’s shirt.

Yes, she really is looking for ice down there!

The fight escalated from ice to water balloons…

In June Rhiannon and Kess got to attend their first Girls Camp! They had so much fun!! They were a little nervous at first, but the older girls were so great to them and helped them feel comfortable. Rhiannon even bore her testimony on the last night of camp! The weather was horrible the whole week of camp. The girls were evacuated twice because of tornado warnings and thunderstorms. Of course the weather only made their first year at camp more memorable.

The week after girls camp Colin attended his first Cub Scout Day Camp. It was so much fun! I attended it with him several afternoons. It was sooooo hot, but it was a lot of fun!

Colin had two favorite activities. One was shooting (BBs of course)

His other favorite was archery.

The week was filled with many activities and opportunities to earn belt loops.

The water relay race was a lot of fun, too.

On the last day a fire truck came and sprayed all of the kids. They were drenched, dirty, and worn out!

Whew…the next week we left for our family vacation. What a busy first month of summer!

A Letter to Harry

2009-07-17T23:02:00.001-05:00

Dear Harry Potter,

I'm sorry to inform you that we need to end our relationship. I know, I know...I've loved you and been with you through all seven of your books, and five of your movies. I've enjoyed our time together, however all good things must come to an end. You see, Harry, you no longer bring me joy...only heartache and annoyance. Because of you....

THEY

got all dressed up tonight to go to their first movie, YOUR movie, alone with a friend...(although, much to their dismay dad did go to the same movie, just not "with" them. )

And as if it's not enough that you're responsible for aging my daughters over night...you are also responsible for the fact that tonight I cleaned

THISOn my hands and knees because...

THISwas used as a broomstick earlier in the week!

Thanks so much, Harry.

He survived...

2009-05-26T21:08:00.000-05:00

(So what's with throwing the gang signs when he gets his little diploma?)

Er...or should I say...his teacher survived! Connor is wrapping up his first year of school. He's had such a great year and has done really well. We are so proud of him. Here are a few videos from his Kindergarten Celebration tonight.

This first one is my absolute favorite! What a hoot!

Oh what a fun year you've had Connor. You were adorable tonight! Dad and I are both so very proud of you. You've grown and changed so much this year. We're so proud of how much you've learned. I love listening to you read! I love all of your little sentences you write! I love the little person you have become! I love you!

Co-dependency Anyone?

2009-04-17T17:58:00.000-05:00

Rhiannon was having some fun with my phone...that explains the color...I didn't even know you could change the color. As for the co-dependency...she was kidding...I think.

Coping Mechanism

2009-04-17T17:52:00.000-05:00

There are a variety of ways to cope with stress. Apparently I cope with the stress of a long, long day and quarreling children by singing Broadway tunes in the Taco Bell drive thru.

Bring it ON!

2009-04-01T16:11:00.000-05:00

It happens. Every month, it happens. Hormone levels drop and I have a very bad day. In the past these days have manifested themselves in a variety of ways. Sometimes, I become paranoid and believe that everyone hates me. Other times I've been known to cry, a lot, and feel far too overwhelmed to ever get anything accomplished. There's been months of ravenous hunger, eating brownies and ice cream and any combination of carbs I can find. THIS month however, I decided would be different. Even though there is a plethora of things to freak out and cry about, I decided I was going to hold it together no matter WHAT! Well, don't ever declare war on Mother Nature.....

I awoke this morning, and knew with the dull ache in my head that today was not going to be a very good day. I decided to shut the world OUT. I closed my door, crawled into bed, put a pillow over my head, and pulled my covers around me. I was going to crawl into my hole and emerge tomorrow a much happier being. Of course this lasted for about thirty minutes until a concerned phone call reminded me that I could not spend the day, locked in my room.

So, I decided to fight this thing head ON! First, I thought I would color my gray hairs. Primping makes everyone feel better, right? In light of recent events, I would just have to do the job myself. I've done it numerous times in the past, and never ONCE have I had a coloring mishap....until now. Red roots, black ends. I was almost pushed over the edge. I fought the tears with a vengeance. "Today will be a good day!" Maybe I was being dramatic, maybe it's not so bad. Well, my fears were confirmed after school!

My spirited Kess, "Mom, I like your hair."

Me, hopeful, "Really?"

Kess, "Yeah, it is so spunky! You're like a rock star mom! I would totally do my hair like that if I could."

Not exactly the look I was going for, "Mmmm...yeah, thanks, Kess."

I look over at Rhiannon who's eyebrows are raised and a look of disdain paints her face.

"I don't like it. "

"Yeah, I know. It's black and red isn't it?

"Yes." She says.

Enough said.

After school we also went to the library. I don't know what it is about the Bentonville library, but I NEVER have a good experience there. EVER. Of course my account was expired, and of course I had a late fee, and OF COURSE I was helped by some tacky little old woman with tightly permed hair and large amounts of exposed cleavage.

"Ummm....let's see, is all of your information still correct?"

"Yes."

"Okay," she then pulls my name up on the computer and glances at the screen, then at me, then back at the screen and says, "Ew. Well you must have been really tired when we took your picture before and you had much longer hair."

What the HELL? Excuse me while I go climb back into my hole. I'll see you guys in a few days.

A Special Day

2009-03-07T23:39:00.000-06:00

Today was Colin's Baptism Day. He turned 8 last week and was baptized today. Sweet Sarah took these lovely pictures and made us a video. It's absolutely beautiful. It's perfect! Thank you Sarah! Colin's baptism was so special and the Spirit was so strong. We were blessed to have my family here with us. After the Baptism I took Colin to pick out his very own Scriptures. We spent the rest of the day hanging out, playing, laughing, and eating. It was so, SO much fun!

The Call

2009-02-15T23:19:00.000-06:00

The world seems like a scarey place right now. There have been mornings when I've woken up and literally was so overcome with fear I wasn't sure I could get out of bed. The thought of getting the kids dressed, making lunches, driving them to school, and going about daily business was almost more than I could bear.

The state of our nation's economy makes the future seem so uncertain. Todd lost his job a week ago. OUR financial future, our home, our bills, food for our children, it all seems so uncertain. BUT, is it really uncertain? The logistics are uncertain...when will we find a job, what will we do in the mean time, how is our life on Earth really going to play out? I'm so comforted by an inspired talk given by Pres. Uchtdorf in October's General Conference. He reminds us that, "Despair drains from us all that is vibrant and joyful and leaves behind the empty remnants of what life was meant to be."

I've thought so much about how if I spend all of my time consumed by the despair and frustration I feel, then I will miss out on so much! Rhiannon and Kess will never be 12 again. Colin will never be 7, almost 8, and Connor will never be 6 again. What I will miss can never be replaced. But this trial in our life will be over at some point. It is NOT permanent.

I know that with faith we will move forward, but faith, alone, doesn't get rid of the gnawing pain in my stomach. This is why I love that Pres. Uchtdorf points out that faith, hope, and charity are a three legged stool. I forgot that I don't just need faith, but also hope. Hope is essential! He said, "Hope is not knowledge, but rather the abiding trust that the Lord will fulfill His promise to us. It is believing and expecting that our prayers will be answered. It is manifest in confidence, optimism, enthusiasm, and patient perseverance."

Rhiannon and Kess love the Narnia movies. Last week they were listening to the final song, "The Call" by Regina Spektor. I stopped what I was doing and listened to the words of that song. I cried tears of joy as I was reminded of C.S. Lewis's message and theme throughout his Narnia series. I know he didn't write the lyrics to the song, but the lyrics are inspired and truly sum up C.S. Lewis's message. I was filled with emotion as I remembered that I did live with God before I was born. I know that he loves me, and waits for my return. I felt renewed strength and hope. One particular line of the song struck me the most. It says, "Just because everything's changing doesn't mean it's never been this way before. All you can do is try to know who your friends are as you head off to the war." I couldn't help but think of the scriptures and the cycles that all of the people went through. Righteousness, pride and trials, repentance, humbling themselves before the Lord, blessings, righteousness...and the cycle continues.

The situation we find ourselves in today, the economy, the uncertainty for our future. It's really no big surprise. We've known it was coming. I find great peace in knowing this is nothing new. We will be tried and tested, and then it will pass. All I can do is have faith, have hope, and know which voices to listen to. I'm so grateful for modern day revelation. I'm grateful for the knowledge I DO have. I'm even grateful for the inspiration of C.S. Lewis. I'm so grateful for a dear friend who loves me enough to talk me out of bed...and threaten me out of bed. I'm so grateful for an inspired friend who reminded me today of Pres. Uchtdorf's message of hope. I'm also grateful for the knowledge that along with the cycle of righteousness and repentance there's another cycle. As Pres Uchtdorf said, "Because God has been faithful and kept His promises in the past, we can hope with confidence that God will keep His promises to us in the present and in the future."

Here's a link to Pres. Uchtdorf's address in case you want to read it, http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=f318118dd536c010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=25c5a0ad4843d110VgnVCM100000176f620a____&hideNav=1

Also, here's a link to "The Call" that someone posted on youtube. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oNsQewlFtEs

A Penguin's Holiday

2009-01-29T23:35:00.000-06:00

December was a month of many activities. One of many activities was Colin's second grade play, "A Penguin's Holiday". We learned from experience last year when Colin had a first grade play and we stood in the back of the cafeteria, unable to see him even ONCE. So, this year we arrived at the play 45 minutes early. It still wasn't early enough. We sat about 10 rows back and still the pictures I got of him are not very good. I felt sooo bad for all the inexperienced moms and dads who came 15 minutes before the play only to find they were crammed in like sardines unable to see above the heads in front of them. Since we were in for a long wait we kept ourselves busy by handing the camera over to Connor. Here is a sampling of his photo shoot.

Here I am lookin' mighty fine...well, not exactly fine...more like exhausted, haggard, skanky. It was December, what can I say. (What's my excuse this month?)

Here's Todd, posing so handsomely. A face only a mother could love. Boy, what a great looking couple. HAHAHA!!!

Now, here's a fine lookin' group. Kess, Rhiannon, and Helen. At least they had each other to help the minutes tick by faster. (Notice the people in the background. Those are their seats, back against the wall! YUK! Can't these schools afford a few more chairs? Or how 'bout we just forego the Christmas program altogether?)

Awww, and finally it was time for the show to begin. The program was actually really cute. The kids and teachers did a great job. Colin played one of Santa's reindeer. He was Vixen. He delivered his part beautifully. We were so proud of him! He had entertained us for weeks before the show singing his songs, and doing a little dance. He's quite the performer!

I'm With the Band

2009-01-29T22:53:00.000-06:00

Sixth grade is an exciting year! Finally the kids get to pick a specialty at school and take an extra class. The choices are things like choir, orchestra, band, art, etc. Rhiannon and Kess both picked band and they both chose the clarinet. Oh, how I stressed over purchasing that blasted clarinet. Hours...I mean HOURS spent pouring over clarinets on ebay. I was a nervous wreck. All the band teachers said, "Don't buy a clarinet on ebay." Being a rule follower made it so hard to take the plunge. But with some help from another band mom, Ayreann, I found two perfect instruments. We bought them from two retired band teachers who were very helpful and did a great job cleaning up the instruments.

The girls were so excited to start band and they've done an EXCELLENT job! It's been so fun to listen to them playing around the house. I love it when they have a song test and they play it over and over again. I love the sounds of one of them upstairs, the other one downstairs, constant repetition and echoing of the same song. Oh, I wish they would play it every day. I never could understand why my parents enjoyed hearing me play the piano, but now I know.

They had a very brief band concert in December. It was at the high school. We got seated in the auditorium and the curtains on stage were closed. As soon as we heard them warming up behind the curtains I got goose bumps. Then the curtains opened and I started to cry. I know, I know, but it was just so exciting. I'm so proud of them. I love that they are doing something that I've never done. I love that it's something they can teach me! I love seeing their independence and love of learning something new. Just one more reason I'm so grateful that I sent them to public school!

Unfortunately during the concert I never could see Rhiannon. So, I got a few shots of Kess, and a picture of their friend Helen. Helen's the only girl trombone player. That makes her "extra" cool.

On a side note: Helen is the sister of Colin's friend Virginia. We sat by Virginia and her family during the concert. Colin and Virginia giggled and played. They were so cute!

Stolen Moments

2009-01-29T22:41:00.000-06:00

You gotta love a kid with style...and this kid, well he's got style!

Lemme explain the outfit. Indiana Jones hat from his Halloween costume, listening to "Fish Heads" on his CD player (yes, I introduced him to that song..."roly poly fish heads, eat them up, yum!" ), red soccer jersey, green random shorts, reading the comics, and probably chewing the inside of his mouth, like his Grandma! Oh, I LOVE this boy!

NWAKC Dog Show

2009-01-29T20:50:00.000-06:00

On December 6th Georgie and I entered our first Rally competition. Rally is basically a way to ease into the Obedience ring. Traditionally in formal Obedience competitions, only one command can be given and the commands can either be vocal or hand signals. In Rally you can talk to your dog as much as you want, give encouragement, give hand signals and vocal commands together. It's basically a way to get used to the distractions involved in competing and get rid of some of the jitters associated with the obedience trials.

I really didn't prepare Georgie very well at all. She's never been to any formal classes, but she's incredibly intelligent, okay...not according to Todd or Sarah....but she IS and she's very attentive, too. Plus she loves to work and she's so stinkin' happy and bouncy that I just had to enter her in the show.

My friend Diane, who is also my training buddy, entered her dog Zelda, (who happens to be Georgie's half sister).

Rhiannon and Kess also went to the show to give us their support and to watch us strut our stuff. They gave us lots of love and encouragement. Just when the day couldn't get any better, imagine my surprise when Sarah showed up...in Fayetteville, with her 3 small children in tow, just to support us and cheer us on. Imagine her surprise when I told her to please not yell, "Go black bitch", when it was our turn! I was so touched by her sacrifice and support. It was a really, really great day. Sarah made it extra fun and entertaining. She even blogged about it...a dogumentary, as she likes to call it.

Georgie did well. She got kind of distracted with all of the barking dogs. It wasn't a clean performance, but she did what I asked and it was a great first time. She and Zelda tied with 97 points. Zelda's time was faster, though. So Diane and Zelda took second place, and we took third. It was great to finally be back in the "dog world" again, and we're looking forward to the spring and attending a few more shows!

After it was all over I was so happy, not that you can tell from my cheesy grin...thumping heart, sweaty palms, but Georgie kept her cool and just looked for more bums to sniff!

A Blog Re-Evaluation

2009-01-29T20:23:00.000-06:00

It's almost February. Wow, a whole month in the year '09 is almost gone. I'm so sad that I haven't blogged in a month. I'm sad that it's almost February and I still haven't blogged Christmas. This feeling has led to some serious self questioning. Why am I avoiding blogging? Is it really a lack of time? Why does it feel like a chore everytime I think about blogging? Well, like all good self conversations, there came a very defining answer. THE REASON: I don't want to blog because I'm thinking about blogging for the wrong audience....which brings unnecessary pressure.

There are great blogs on the internet. Friends blogs, funny blogs, entertaining blogs, awesome inspiring blogs, organizational blogs...and blogs that are all of the above and so much more...yeah, you know who you are....and once again I was feeling pressure to be like everyone else. My dearest friend has a beautiful blog, but she blogs for the right reason, for her family. It just so happens she has real talent and her blog is entertaining and I look forward to every new post.

So, questions to self: What do I want out of my blog? What's my purpose?

Self answers: My purpose is to record memories. To not feel guilty about the buckets of unused scrapbook stuff I have. To know at the end of the year I will have something I can print and give to my children. To know that I'm recording our family history, our ins and outs, ups and downs. I want something for my children. I want my blog to be for them. Does it matter if it's just a lot of pictures and boring dialogue? It might matter to some, but it shouldn't matter to me, because those words, those recorded moments, will be so precious to my children. Just like every other "good" thing in life, I can make blogging better and more meaningful with a "better" attitude. So, alas...here I go....again. Oh, and I'll try not to be discouraged that after such a short time of blogging, I'm already re-evaluating my intentions. Alas, that tis who I am...so most importantly, I want my kids to know who I am...not "who" I'm trying to be.

Are You Kidding Me??

2009-01-07T17:27:00.000-06:00

I've just got to pose a question. Is there some kind of internal rule book that tells girls that when they turn twelve it its mandatory to primp for an hour in the bathroom before attending a YW's activity? Because my newly turned 12 year olds are primping...they don't even wear make up...what is there to primp?

They are primping before their first YW Wednesday night activity. They've never even been to an activity. How do they know that's what girls do before a Wednesday night activity? Well, I mean, that's what other girls do..I never did that! Oh boy...here we go!

By the way...I've got tons of Christmas stuff to post. It may not get posted until July, but it will be blogged about, eventually.

We need a little Christmas

2008-12-14T15:40:00.000-06:00

December 6th was a very busy Saturday. We woke up early and went to Breakfast with Santa. We had pancakes and sausage. The kids took turns telling Santa what they wanted for Christmas.

Even the girls weren't too cool for Santa!
Bradley was Rhiannon's buddy for the day. They're so cute!

Bryce, Colin, Rhiannon, Bradley(love the lips), and Connor. Judging by the color of my boys' shirts, you'd think I thought it was a Thanksgiving parade instead of a Christmas parade. However, I just grabbed what was clean. And the lucky winner was orange.

After the breakfast we walked to the square to stake out our seats for the annual Bentonville Christmas parade. Excitement was in the air, the music was blaring and piercing our ear drums. The kids were dancing with excitement. I was busy laying out blankets saving spots for our crew. I ticked off a lot of children when the candy started being thrown during the parade, because I wouldn't let them stand on my blankets. So to make up for it, I caught the candy and distributed it to those who were less fortunate and didn't get to the parade as early as I did to ensure a front row seat. Gee, aren't I nice? It was a LOT of fun!

The boys enjoyed torturing Bryce by playing, "Let's see who can smother Bryce with the most attention."

Soon, the game changed to dancing for Bryce. Colin showed him how it was done. "You got to move it, move it!"
Bryce danced with his head...it was the only body part free to move, because everything else was bundled in blankets.

Oooooh, he's so CUTE. Sarah and Tom have three BEAUTIFUL children!

Soon, the first float meandered down the road. Rhiannon watched intently.

Everyone was in such awe that they couldn't manage even a tiny smile. The Bentonville parade is mesmerizing.
Todd and Colin enjoying the festivities.

Here are a few of my favorite floats.

First and foremost must be the Girl Scout Cookie float. This float has nothing to do with my love of Girl Scouts. It's all about the Cookies! Anyone who knows me, knows how I ADORE cookies. I love them. I've never met a bad cookie, (okay except for those loft house cookies at Walmart that are sugar cookies iced in pink or yellow with sprinkles, that everyoned seems to love but me? Yeah, that's nasty!)

Bradley and Bryce's sister Karah was in the parade, I didn't get a very good picture of her, but her float was also one of my favorites.

Another one of my favorites was Camp Bow Wow. That's our friend Sherri and her Newfoundland, Bella.

Last, but not least, no parade is complete without a purple car. I love purple.

It's All in the Timing

2008-12-14T15:18:00.000-06:00

My girls are turning twelve in January. I can't believe it. Twelve seems so old. It's such a pivotal age. Now is the time to celebrate mood swings, boys, talking on the phone, being "oh so cool", and boobs.

It seems being a twin could get complicated in this area. Kess has developed much faster than Rhiannon.

Yesterday, when Kess was alone and Rhiannon was playing outside, Sarah congratulated her on her new boobs. Which is amazing because it appears over night she went from a developing chest to real boobs. Kess smiled so sweetly and embarrassed and Sarah explained to her how wonderful they are and not to be embarrassed. We talked about how we didn't want to hurt Rhiannon's feelings by saying anything in front of her.

At that moment, the door swung open and Rhiannon very loudly announced, "Mom, I want new boo?s for Christmas!"

We died laughing. Did she say she wants new BOOBS for Christmas?

"What did you say Rhiannon?"

"I said I want new booTs for Christmas!"

Oh my gosh, the timing...it was hilarious!

One more post

2008-12-14T14:27:00.000-06:00

We ate Thanksgiving dinner at my Aunt Jacque and Uncle Bobby's house in Little Rock.

Leave it to my mom to make Thanksgiving interesting. Thanks mom, you little deer.
Looks like Chris had a plate full of deliciousness.

A table full of boys under the age of 8, now that's fun!

Kess enjoying a yummy roll.

Uncle Bobby scooping out some of his cherry cobbler made in a dutch oven, for Rhiannon.

My cousin Tamra enjoying her dinner.

Aunt Carolyn and Uncle Sonny (who appears to be deep in thought.)

Todd appearing to have a good time. I'm sure he would admit otherwise, though.

The children playing with and mauling the small pup. Somehow Colin managed to take his DS to Thanksgiving dinner, not something I was proud of.

My cousin Machelle and her husband Bob.

My cousin Marshall and his girlfriend, Maurice.

Tamra was blessed with identical twin boys. They are four, Luke and John. They live in Pennsylvania so we haven't seen them since they were babies. My girls adored them and they entertained each other all evening.

The ladies in attendance, back row: Mary, Carolyn, Machelle, Tamra, me. Front row: Maurice, Jacque, Rhiannon, Kess, Mom

The men in attendance: Bob, Todd, Bobby, Sonny, Marshall, ? Marshall's friend. Front row: Cole (Maurice's son), Luke and John (who's who?), Colin, Connor.

Not pictured because they'd already gone home to work on costumes, Dad, Nikki, and Chris.

Whew...Thanksgiving is over. I can now move on!

Over the River and Through the Woods

2008-12-09T21:43:00.000-06:00

Okay...so it has literally been five weeks since I blogged. I think I was beginning to procrastinate it along with a whole list of other to do's. But this is supposed to be FUN...so here goes. It's almost the middle of December and I still have not blogged about Thanksgiving. WARNING! The following posts may be very boring, but I'm in a hurry and have little time to embellish. I must get through November so I can move on to December!

The weekend before Thanksgiving we drove to Memphis. The girls played in a soccer tournament. My parents kept the boys in Little Rock, but drove to Memphis Saturday morning for one game. Chris, my brother, and the boys curled up in the back seat of the Malibu. Poor Uncle Chris became a very handy pillow. And I think he loved every minute of it. Isn't he adorable? I love him.After the Tournament all four kids stayed in Little Rock and Todd and I drove back to NWA so that he could work a few days before Thanksgiving.

Here's what my children did while they enjoyed their vacation from mom and dad:

Stayed up way too late playing video games.

Stayed up way too late playing with the pups.

And just stayed up way too late...and were exhausted. They hung out at Hearts and Hooves and watched Chris ride his favorite horse Lloyd.

They walked the Big Dam Bridge (which crosses the Arkansas river)with Grandpa, while mom tried to be comforted by the fact that no one has actually fallen off the bridge, unless you count the drunk guy who climbed over the side. I survived outings with my dad, so surely my children would too.

They played Pilgrims and Indians with hats Grandma helped them make. I'm not sure if Connor was a turkey, or playing Star Wars at this point, but needless to say, they enjoyed stringing him up and carrying him around like a piece of meat (they did have his hands tied together, and his feet tied together, but for this picture they had already removed his ropes.)

Pumpkin pie anyone?

They scratched each other's back.

They also made a little money. Grandpa put them to work raking leaves. All Connor asked for in exchange were 100 shiny pennies. Grandpa was happy to oblige!
OH, and don't forget what they did after they piled up all the leaves!
A swan dive!
I think it's safe to say, "Everyone had a GREAT time!" I'm so grateful that they have grandparents who are a part of their lives and adore them so much. They are blessed.

Drum roll please....

2008-10-29T00:03:00.000-05:00

I've kind of had a theme going this year. Starting this blog has been a part of that theme. You know..you remember, right...the whole "Just who IS Courtney? And what exactly does she like?" Well, I finally found something I like. It's actually something I've ALWAYS liked, but never really paid much attention to it. I just assumed I couldn't do it. I'm taking a cake decorating class from the sweetest little old lady at Hobby Lobby. Here is my debut cake.

Now, I learned a few things from this cake. First of all...Pilsbury cake mixes are far too moist and just fall apart. Second that I really do demand perfection...that can be a very UGLY characteristic. BUT I learned to accept imperfection, too. You see, I started making this cake...and in my unrealistic self conversation I had already decided exactly how PERFECT my first cake was going to be. Then I started icing it....oooohh...it was bad, very bad. I was angry and mean and cranky. Ask Sarah, she called right in the middle of my tantrum. Just as I was about to throw the entire thing away she kindly reminded me that this WAS my first cake, and what would it hurt to actually finish it. Reluctantly I did. And I'm so glad I did, because it's important for me to be proud of it despite it's many...many imperfections. I pretty much need to carry this concept over into other areas of my life. I fear the type of example I'm setting for my children. We can never aim to be perfect in this life. An accepting attitude is far more peaceful to live with.

Here is my second cake that I had to finish in class on Monday. It too is full of imperfections...but I suppose if I had really mastered this "I'm not good enough" attitude, I probably would've just said, "Here's my lovely second cake that I'm so proud of..." So, HERE is my second cake, that I'm so proud of. I do love the little purple flowers on the bottom.

I start Course 2 on Monday. I'm very excited and loving the class. And if you'd like to check out some cakes with humor go here.

(Be sure and check out the fan favorites on the right side) Maybe I'll be famous someday and find one of my cakes on her blog. Hey, what can I say, I've gotta dream big!

Colin's Musical Debut

2008-10-28T23:47:00.000-05:00

Every Friday Colin's school has what they call Weekly Roundup. Each class takes a turn being in charge of the program that day. Colin loves to dance and perform so he was SO excited to learn they would be dancing to a popular song from Camp Rock. Here are two cute short little clips of him. Enjoy!

A Canadian Thanksgiving

2008-10-28T23:14:00.000-05:00

When Todd left his mission in Little Rock, AR he swore he would never...EVER...live in Arkansas again. Within a year, the poor guy had his permanent residency and has resided in the Natural State, ever since (thanks to me). I'm sure he'd never admit it, but I think he considers himself an Arkansan now, (of course, never an American...he must be true to his Canadian roots). Sometimes being so far from home can be hard for him. So, this year we decided to celebrate Canadian Thanksgiving.

The kids were home from school that day (Columbus day for we Americans) so it was nice to have them around as we cooked turkey, and bread dressing (not cornbread, mind you), and strawberry rhubarb pie. Honestly, dinner wasn't terribly fancy. I had to be at a class by 6:00, so I basically prepared Todd's favorite Thanksgiving fare...(and we had just a turkey breast instead of the whole thing) therefore dinner was certainly lacking in vegetables. (If you're bored...skip to the next post. The following is more for my kids than anything.)

Bread dressing...it was SO delicious...sorry mom, way better than the cornbread!

During dinner we talked about the diffences between Todd's Thanksgiving dinners as a Canadian and my dinners as a Southern American. Todd's dinners usually included: Turkey, bread dressing, cranberry sauce, turnip greens, corn, mashed potatoes, rice pudding, pumpkin pie, strawberry rhubarb pie, tomato juice, and Canada dry. My dinners were :Turkey, cornbread dressing, no cranberry sauce...but usually a cranberry concoction of my mom's..broccoli rice casserole, green bean casserole, SWEET potatoes with LOADS of marshmallows...YUM..., pumpkin, pecan, chocolate, and peanut butter pies. Beverages were usually soda...coke, dr.pepper, etc.

It was fun sharing the differences with the kids and discussing why daddy is always ready for a turkey dinner by Christmas and mom is used to ham for Christmas dinner. (Don't forget the time we actually had a less traditional Christmas dinner of ham and potato salad, mom...lol...weren't there baked beans involved too....don't disown me for posting that!)

The Druthers

2008-10-17T10:28:00.000-05:00

On a glorious day like today there are many places I'd rather be than trapped at home with a chicken pox infected child.

For example I could be here (it is craft fair weekend ya' know) Or here
Better yet, I could be here.

But nay, instead I'm left to do this (look away, Martindales)
and this But maybe I'll get to do this. ZZZZZZZ!

Maybe it's a good thing I'm stuck at home...should probably stop blogging now.

The Pit of Despair

2008-10-16T23:38:00.000-05:00

About a month ago, (possibly longer) I decided I would do a "get real" post and take pictures of my boys messy, messy room. The idea was that I would then take pictures of it all clean and tidy, and I could feel a sense of accomplishment. Well, instead the room sat...

and SAT...

and got messier...

and MESSIER!

FINALLY...weeks later...I cleaned it. You may be wondering, why didn't Colin and Connor clean it? Honestly, it wasn't worth it. I got to throw things away and dejunk and declutter much faster on my own. My intention now is that they are in charge of maintaining it. We have a basement...basements are for toys...bedrooms are for sleeping. They seem to have a difficult time grasping this concept, because as you can see by the following picture, THIS is what I found tonight.

I believe smoke literally came out my ears and my head began to spin.

Yes, that is Georgie curled up in the closet, on a pile of "who knows what".

Where...where did they find the toys I had discreetly stashed downstairs? And when...WHEN did they bring them upstairs? Where was I? Did they tuck them under their shirts so I wouldn't see them?? Did one of them keep me occupied so that the other could slip by without me noticing? Or do these toys have legs and simply climbed the stairs to the pit of despair? I simply don't get it. I don't.

So, it was time to enforce my newest bedroom rules. And before bedtime their room looked like this, again...at least until tomorrow night!

(Boy, Celeste, I could sure use your decorating skills. Their room may be clean, but it is pretty pathetic, and uninviting!)

My Little Runaway

2008-10-12T23:48:00.000-05:00

This afternoon Connor came to the conclusion that he didn't want to live with us anymore. He decided it was time he found his own place. Not knowing what to do or say, I decided to play along. I informed him that was fine, but he needed to pack his things and find a place to live. I was busy making dinner so I was not available to help him house hunt. I asked him to at least take my phone number with him so that he could call me when he got to his new home.

With the help of his eager sister he got his things packed...sleeping bag, toys, bread, cheese, water, pillow, moccasins (what?), and back pack. He finally decided that the back porch would suit his needs. And off he went into the wide, wide world.

Life was great! He enjoyed the serenity of his new place. His new found independence was invigorating.

He LOVED his new bathroom! (Don't worry, this was posed...I didn't take a picture of the actual act.)

His new bed was quite cozy and he had his most valued toys keeping him company.

All in all things seemed to be going well for him. He announced he would be sleeping in his new house...he was NOT afraid of the bears. Also, living on his own meant he did not have to go back to school. I told him I was proud of his bravery. I agreed that he didn't have to go to school, but the police would come and get him if he did not return to Kindergarten...seeing how it's against the law to skip school and all. I also asked that he knock anytime he wanted to come into my house. He wondered if I would be delivering dinner to him in his new home. "No," I said, "but you are welcome to join us for dinner."

So, after realizing I was fine with his absence from our home, and after knocking several times to be allowed in, I wasn't surprised when he whispered in my ear at dinner, "Umm, mom, I want to come home. I almost cried when I left." I hugged him tightly and told him I'd missed him and was sooo glad he was coming home.

The prodigal son, has returned!

This One's For You

2008-10-12T23:22:00.001-05:00

My kids are always catching me reading blogs or working on mine. Kess wanted to know if I was going to blog about her broken arm. So, this one's for you, Kess.
About two weeks ago Kess was playing soccer against a boys team (very important detail to an 11 yr old girl, it's also important to mention that the girls won!) She was going for the ball and got tangled up with one of the boys. She went down pretty hard, but managed to shake it off and finish out the game. Her arm hurt for most of the weekend, but I honestly did not think it was broken. For my own peace of mind I reluctantly took her to the doctor on Monday, and lo, and behold she had fractured her wrist! A week later we saw an orthopedist who put her in a hot pink cast and told her she could play soccer if she wanted to. So, with her arm wrapped in bubble wrap, Kess played in the Ozark Cup tournament this weekend. Her team won first place! I didn't like the idea of her playing with a broken arm, but she played great! We are so proud of you, Kess! Oooooh, I love you!

What in Da' World?

2008-09-28T23:55:00.000-05:00

Here's a little guessing game for you.

What happened?

A. The cat coughed it up

B. Todd shaved his back again

C. The Jackson 5 had a waxing party in my kitchen

D. My black bitch finally got shaved (it's not a bad word if you're talking about a canine is it?)

E. Sasquatch got a Brazilian

And the answer is....drum roll....

Meet Georgie. Georgie is my 1 year old Standard Poodle. Georgie and I have a bit of a love-hate relationship. She is a very cool dog. She's just what I wanted....problem is...she's just what I wanted. She's pretty bouncy and energetic and kinda crazy! She used to drive me REALLY crazy, but she's maturing and we have a little more love now, as opposed to the hate.

Poor Georgie's hair has been so neglected...for months. I should've taken a before shot...but I just couldn't bear it. I gave her a three hour shave tonight...I still haven't finished her feet. Alas, there she is in all her gnappy headed glory. She really is a sweet pup.

Oh, and Georgie, I'm so sorry about that chunk I took out of your ear. I'm glad the bleeding finally stopped. Please forgive me, and I'll consider forgiving you for pooping in the house yesterday.

"I have absolutely NO idea what you're talking about."

(I would like to thank my consultant, "the three bears" for adding to the humor of this post. I wonder if anyone will ever want to eat in my kitchen again???)

The "S" word

2008-09-20T21:41:00.001-05:00

Some of you know me well enough to know that "Soccer" can be a sore subject in our household. Those of you who are not aware of this...just trust me...kay? Well, soccer season is upon us....again...did it ever end? Kess is playing, Colin is playing, and even Connor has strapped on the shinguards, the thick stinky socks, and cleats to enter the world of soccer.

Soccer can be a pretty intense game. Parents are shouting..."go, go...what are you doing? Now turn around, go, go, oh, my gosh...what is she thinking?" It really builds a kids self esteem to be yelled at and belittled for an hour. I was ready to rip the whistle away from a coach today. Here he was, coaching 4 year olds and needed to blow a whistle every time the ball went out of bounds??? I don't think they even do that all the time in "real" soccer? The dude had serious issues, if you know what I mean. Whistle=Power.

Well, seeing how we've been on the "intense" side of soccer, (yes, I have been guilty of being an obnoxious soccer yelling parent a time or two...oh the shame!!!), but today something great happened, something that just proves that recreational sports can be great, but only...and I do mean ONLY when it's about the kids having FUN!!!

During Connor's game, all of the parents cheered for ALL of the kids. Connor, being the youngest sibling, hasn't had to endure the push of his parents to make him a soccer superstar. He's just been carted from game to game his entire life. He's never had us "coaching" him in the backyard. He just plays occasionally with his brother when waiting for the girls to finish a game.

Playing with Colin consists of Connor being the go-to guy. Connor's the younger brother, so he's never the winner, and he's never the scorer. He's always the goalie and he's always given commands by his "coach". So, it didn't surprise me today to see, that he didn't really care if he scored, he knew to stand at the goal and play some great defense, though. He loved giving orders, telling everyone to back up and where to stand when he did a goal kick. He really loved chasing his friends during half-time, doing cartwheels in the middle of the game, and putting his arm around a friend to have a chat while walking around the field instead of playing. He also laughed every time he fell down, tripping over his own feet, and loved being leapt over by a teammate when they crashed into one another. When asked by his coach if he's ever played soccer before, Connor confidently answered, "Yeah, I played with my brudder!" I loved it!! And THAT folks is what it's ALL about!

Then we had Colin's game. One look at Colin's team this year and the term "Bad News Bears" comes to mind. They are a mix match of 8,9, and10 year olds, girls and boys. Some of them have never stepped on a field before. Today their game was against a 9 year old Academy team (these are "serious" soccer players.) I was geared up and prepared for a blood bath. It took every ounce of self control not to say, "Now Colin, this team is going to kill you, so don't be sad okay. Just, try to have fun." I refrained, knowing that wasn't exactly the healthiest way to support my child.

The first half of the game, was as I expected...7-0. However, I have to say, Colin's team gave it 100%. They never gave up and they played pretty well, all things considered. Then came the second half...and guess who walked out on the field as goalie....COLIN!!! I wanted to hide under the chair, I wanted to yell at the coach..."what are you doing, he can't play goalie. First of all he's SEVEN...second of all he's playing on the same size net as 12 year olds...do you not see the problem with this equation...not to mention he's never played goalie in his life." I bit my tongue and gave him a thumbs up sign. "be supportive, be supportive, echoing in my mind."

Well, can I just tell you, Colin CAN play goalie. He did know what he was doing, and they only scored on him twice. PLUS, he was SOOO happy because he finally got to do a cherry bomb during a game. He's ALWAYS wanted to play goalie and do a cherry bomb, but we always assumed he couldn't play goalie. After losing the game 9-0, Colin climbed in the van all smiles and said, "I get to choose where we go to eat, because I'm the winner!" The WINNER...he said I'm the WINNER!!!!

Now, this isn't a boy who didn't know the score, he told me exactly what the score was, but he said, I'm a winner because my team did a good job. Boy, did I learn my lesson. I was so proud of him and so happy that he didn't have to feel any unnecessary pressure. He did what he loves and he came out a winner. This is what sports should be about. Parents should be on the sidelines, mouths zipped, with the exception of "Go Red, good job, great effort!" If only I'd learned this lesson six years ago!

Gotta Catch 'em All...Pokemon

2008-09-20T20:28:00.000-05:00

Courtney

The Motherly Pokemon

Type: Psychic

This Pokemon Protects her young fiercely and gracefully. You don't wanna get near this pokemon when she is near her young.

(My kids were playing pokemon today, when I snuck in and sat down beside them. At first they weren't sure if I could join in the playing, but then they welcomed me with open arms by making me an official pokemon. The above is what their pokedex said about me. Wow, I feel so privileged!)

Gifts

2008-09-19T12:46:00.000-05:00

I wonder today if I could even count the gifts that I've received from a loving Heavenly Father? How many things in my life have I taken for granted? Sometimes I act as if I'm entitled to the things that I have. A quiet, small voice inside reminds me that everything...everything that I have is a gift from God. A speaker at Time Out For Women made a beautiful point, "the only thing we have to give Him is our will. Everything else he's given to us, time, talent, friends, family, etc."

What would happen if I replaced jealousy, hurt, pride, anger, impatience (to name a few) in my heart with happiness? What if I recognized daily that supportive family and friends are not things that God "has" to give me? Each life that brings greater happiness and love to me is a direct and divine gift from a loving Heavenly Father who doesn't want me to feel alone. Without the important people in my life, my life would be very, very different. I would be on a much darker path.

Gratitude. Something I thought I completely understood. Say "thank you", when someone gives you something, thank God every day for the blessings of family, health, home, etc. Actually, that's not all gratitude is. It's not an action, it's an attitude. An attitude that brings greater love to everyone in our lives. If I could love the people in my life with a spirit of gratitude their feelings of love, appreciation, and worth would grow. If only I could remember that there are no "guarantees". One of my children could wake up tomorrow and learn that he or she has a much shorter life span than I envision. Each day with people that I love is a gift.

It's interesting to think how God works through each of us, if we let Him. He doesn't just help miracles come to pass, by our actions, God works miracles by the amount of love, pure love, that we allow in our hearts to then be passed to others. This love allows for greater understanding. Things we would never "see" or "know" on our own, are made very clear by a loving Heavenly Father.

These are such random thoughts, but I guess what I've been reminded of today is that studying the scriptures, saying my prayers, and listening to the whispers of the Spirit are not just for days of trial. These are not a checklist of things to do when I feel like I can't make it another day. Daily, (er, almost daily, sometimes weekly) spiritual feeding can enable me to love more fully and show greater gratitude. All of these things are gifts from God.

Taking a Time Out

2008-09-15T22:00:00.000-05:00

I just have to pre-empt my post by saying if you'd like to read the funny version of this post please refer here. Also, some of the pictures below have been used without permission, hope I don't get in too much trouble for plagiarism.

FINALLY, after much, much, deliberation, Sarah and I were on our way to St. Louis for Time Out For Women.

Two years ago when we went to St. Louis together Sarah yanked me from my shell and taught me it's okay for grown women to give the "honk your horn" signal to truckers on the interstate. I was so embarrassed and didn't think there were any more road trip games she could possibly teach me. "Oh Contraire!" Sarah decided it would be fun if I took pictures of truckers for her photomentary. It was like a really bad episode of "Starting Over". She as Iyanla and me playing myself...a typical introvert woman, needing to branch out and stop worrying about what other people think of her. However, instead of saying, "Step into your power, gurl." She said, "Do it or I'll kick your butt!" I obliged.

The Con-way truckers were the best subjects...very friendly. He was one of my favorites, and he even radioed down the road to his buddy, who slowed down and was waving before we even got there. I think they liked us!

It really got pretty fun, except I kept stressing over the fact that the sun was in a bad place and none of the pictures were turning out. Then Sarah put on the pressure and said I had to wave and smile first, then take the picture. Her next request was that I stick out my tongue to see if they would do the same. I had to draw the line somewhere...it felt "wrong"...very, very "wrong". What if they followed us to the next truck stop? No thank you!!!

The rest of the day consisted of lounging, ice cream, shopping, butter burger, fries, frozen custard, casino for a pretzel the size of my head, and karaoke.

Let me rewind though, CULVERS!!! Oh my gosh! Beautiful! I finally got to have a butter burger. Here is the experience carefully documented, compliments of Sarah!

It's worth posting my ridiculous looking pics just so I can relive that first bite. DELICIOUS! I seriously believe they put happy powder in their food. Everything about it is HAPPY!!!

As for Karaoke...oh, that was not pretty! Let's have a serious conversation about this-kay? The bar was small, there were very few people, most were drunk. The guy running the gig couldn't sing, but was in love with his voice. It was supposed to be for FUN! Sarah sang a beautiful version of Norah Jones, "Come Away with Me". Casey and Meg rapped. It was great. Why, why was I such a chicken? Sarah tried to get me to sing, but being the stubborn pissant I am, I wouldn't do it. I regretted it all night. I could've sang Lisa Loeb, "Stay". But nay, I was too worried about how horrible it would sound. I love to sing, so why didn't I just get up there and belt it out?!

Well, because I had horrible flashbacks of my Sr. year in high school. I was Chava in "Fiddler on the Roof". The orchestra is blaring from the pit, I have to sing my solo in "Matchmaker" and I felt absolutely trapped. What is my note, when do I come in, why are they playing so fast??? I wanted to crawl into a hole! I can't sing to the instruments. Gimme a piano, and play my notes...and I'll sing. But give me all this mumbo jumbo without my notes...it's just not pretty! I was so sad. Seriously, when will I learn to let go, be stupid, and not really care? I wonder, was I like that as a teenager? Has it only been since adulthood that I got so uptight? I could seriously get voted out of the Starting Over House for this!

We got back to the hotel at 1. We reaked of Cigarette smoke, we were exhausted and just wanted to shower and go to bed. Oh, but wait. There was a blood stain on our sheets, the replacement sheets were wet, upon ripping the sheet back we realized the sheets were not only "stained" but dirty because there was a matching stain on the mattress pad, among other things!!! So, basically, three sets of sheets, and three mattress pads later we crawled into our less comfortable bed (they were out of the nice fluffy mattress pads). It was 2am, we were too exhausted to even enjoy the slumber party. We hoped we would awake refreshed and ready to be spiritually fed, (and another trip to Culvers wouldn't hurt either!)

Dinner and a Show

2008-09-14T22:20:00.000-05:00

Since the boys were itty bitty they have never been able to sit still while they eat. They are constantly up and down, standing in their chairs, or doing little demonstrations. I'm not sure we ever make it through an entire meal with their bootys in the chair the entire time. Most nights consist of me and Todd taking turns saying, "sit down. sit down, boys. you need to sit down. SIT DOWN!!!!"

Tonight the main event was really my fault. Colin was demonstrating an oompah-loompah from Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory...he was doing so with impeccable timing and stage presence! So, I said, Colin you should be in the movies. Would you ever want to take dance? He proceeded to show me his ballet and hip hop moves. What a funny guy. Yes, this was all in the middle of dinner, I'm not sure Todd was amused, but hey, the boys have got moves, I had to capture them!

Well, like any other younger brother, Connor couldn't be out done. So, he joined in.

Funny Quote of the Day

2008-09-10T19:42:00.000-05:00

While surfing the internet, Connor sat next to me drawing with markers. The lid fell to the floor and he got down to search for it. "Mom," he said, "Did you know these guys can disappear?" Not really paying attention, I said, " No, I didn't. " "Yeah," he said, "that's because they are magic markers."

What a funny boy. It makes me wonder how many things he says that must go unnoticed, because I'm off in my own "zone". I wish I could remember to soak up every moment with my children and not get so caught up in their drama and my thoughts. Mothering is definitely a work in progress!

Fishin' For Reel

2008-09-05T20:33:00.000-05:00

I live in an imaginary world. I have constant internal conversations. Every event in my life has previously been played out as a perfect scenario within the walls of "Courtney World". The only problem is...in Real Life things don't always run as smoothly as I envision they will. Friday afternoon I decided to take the kids fishing. I took this on with the complete knowledge that I would be the only active adult in this endeavor of baiting and fixing and casting and, well...fishing. I knew it was going to be a beautiful and magical and fun filled trip. In my world we were standing on the banks, casting, and speaking softly as we each reeled in our big catches, one at a time in a very orderly fashion. Well, the real version goes a little like this.

Evidently the only bait available at Wal-Mart, are nightcrawlers. "Ooooh..." said my dad, "Those are like baiting a hook with a small snake." I dismissed this comment assuming he was exaggerating. As I pulled out the first wriggling specimen, I realized how true this statement was. I was literally shaking knowing that at any moment this "harmless" worm was going to grow fangs and swallow my finger. He was FIGHTING me. I tried to appear confident for the onlooking children. Eventually, I had to play dirty with the small snakes and cut them in half with pliers....while trying not to puke. Things really got interesting when one of them sprayed something all over Connor...umm...yeah.

Finally, everyone was baited, and then the wait began. Twenty minutes later we still had not seen any signs of life in the water. Of course, the twenty minutes consisted of, "I'm hot, I'm bored, I'm thirsty, hey...watch out...when are we gonna catch something" Oh, and Colin decided he didn't like me hurting the worms so he would dig his hands into the container and hold all 20 of them in his hands..UCK...then he would howl when I tried to use them for bait. Finally, we agreed on which one was his friend and he carried him around and tortured Todd for the remainder of the time...(Yes, he is showing his worm to Todd. Is Todd's finger a subliminal message about how he REALLY feels about fishing?)

Finally, we saw FISH!!! Everyone caught a couple, and there were tears over the ones who got away. It was usually someone else's fault. There were a few fish tragedies I tried to hide from the kids and I prayed every time I threw the fish back, that they would at least appear to swim until they got out of sight, knowing they would soon be doing the backstroke.

Eventually the girls joined Colin in setting the worms free. They ran up and down the banks until they found an injured bird. They were sure it was our duty to capture him and nurse him back to health. All I could see when I looked at him was "bird flu", so I convinced them he was fine and knew how to take care of himself. Finally, the last worm was cast out and eaten. It was time to go. As we piled in the van Todd reminded all of us about washing up when we got home. He looked at me and said, "What's for dinner? You are going to shower when you get home, right?" Awww, well it wasn't my fantasy, but it was fun!

Evolutions...and not of the X-Men or Heroes freaky kind

2008-09-02T23:57:00.000-05:00

Welcome to my new blog! This is a momentous occasion! Why, you may ask...it's just a blog. Well friends...and people I don't know...it is soooo much more than that. This blog symbolizes just another step in my evolution. (Yes, I've been watching "Heroes" season 2 on DVD in order to get caught up before the next season starts...but I'm seriously not talking about that kind of evolution). This past year has been full of changes for me. Last summer I was ready to embark on a new journey...public school for my oldest three and preschool for Connor. Wow...what a huge step. It took a while for me to be comfortable with the idea...but we did it and there is no lookin' back!!! From there I find myself one year later with four in school and me home alone! Wow...now if that's not evolution! And even better, I'm totally okay with it and lovin' it!!!

More evolution...take my hair, for example, last year...long and dark....

This year....short and blond and growing again! Also, I had a few extra meaty pounds on me, which I've worked off since then. (Of course it's all creepin' back on, but we'll save that conversation for another day...and we will also save the conversation about avoidance and procrastination...haven't quite conquered those yet).

Yes, this is me, in all my unkept, unclean, smelly glory...NASTY, but, in an attempt to stay true to my blogging purpose I posted this picture to begin my journey of not trying to be perfect, or appear perfect. And I could probably use a little help in the "how not to look like a boy" department. My hair getting longer will help fo' sure, but hey it's all about the process, right?

But back to my original thought, why is this blog significant as opposed to the one I had started? Because I'm finally in a place where I want to be comfortable with me. Holy cow, I feel like I've been to the depths of places I never wanna go back to, over this past year. It has been a tumultuos and long, long journey...and it's not over yet, BUT I have emerged and I'm getting to know myself, I think for the first time. And it's a really good thing! So, hence I needed a blog that was more me.

I love people, some more than others, (yeah, you know who you are). And there are so many people I want to emulate because I adore them...take Lorelai Gilmore for example...I want to be her. She eats whatever she wants, never gains a pound, she's hilarious and so witty, she can totally say the right thing to her uptight daughter (I have one of those), and she's not a rule follower (unfortunately, I am!) But it's time to let go of being someone other than Court. Some people like me, so surely they see something I don't. My blog will never be as funny as Sarah's, http://thethreelittlebearcubs.blogspot.com/, but that's okay...because that's one reason I love her...She's hilarious. If we were both hilarious, it would just be one big competition. "I'm funnier, no I'm funnier...etc" Plus, she takes gorgeous pictures...I love pictures, but do I have to be as good as Sarah...no! I have my own style...and that's OK. (Sorry, don't mean to pick on you Sarah!) There are blogs of people I don't even know, and I'll never be as charming or beautiful or have as much style and flair as they do! But who cares. That's the point, this blog is ME! Whatever that is. I could go on and on about the lessons I've learned and continue to learn, but then what else would we talk about. There will probably be a lot of evolving going on here...so stick around. It could get interesting! Oh, yeah...and purple is my FAVORITE color! And I've learned I want to be a cake decorator...eventually!

Road Kill

2008-09-02T21:28:00.000-05:00

I kill animals. That simple. Some sick person at the mini van plant put an internal animal magnet inside my wheel wells. Did you know that 1 million vertebrates are run over each day in the United States? That is a rate of one every 11.5 seconds.....now that is a lot of roadkill - and I am responsible for a large majority of those.

Among my victims are the snake, raccoon, possum, turtle, bunny, bird, armadillo, and near fatalities with a dog, cat, and a deer. My friend Sarah even nicknamed my van "Slayah!"

I used to get really upset over it and I know just accept it as my fate....and theirs. I used to swerve and now I just go straight and hope for the best. I fear I am becoming past feeling on this issue. I have even been known to laugh a time or two. Do I ditch the car? Is it me? These are conversations I can't help but have with myself.

Fasten your seat belts as you endure many conversations with Court.

I am a friend of the animals. Really. I am.